Practice Reveals Perfection

I’ve been thoroughly enjoying reading and studying books on personal growth, spirituality, love, etc. but I also know that I need to get back out into the world and start meeting new people and applying what I’ve learned. I need to make friends and try out some new activities. I found a whole bunch of groups to join online, and one that I’m pretty happy about in particular is a community service group. I’ve always wanted to do one of those habitat for humanity things or something like it, but somehow never ended up doing it. When I first started looking to get involved, it looked like everything was through churches, which turned me off from it. Now I’ve found a group (not affiliated with a church) that will keep me updated on volunteer opportunities. I’m pretty excited!

These past few weeks… I’m telling you, they’ve been rough, but they’ve also been very rewarding. I feel very at peace right now. These books and blogs were not kidding that when you open yourself up, life will test you! Life will bring you all your fears so that you can push through them. I feel like they rotate through – medium fear, small fear, medium fear, massive fear, small fear, medium fear… And maybe I don’t completely resolve some of the fears, but at least it is progress. I’m aware. I can see what’s happening, and I can see that I don’t have to feel that way. Or, in the most serious cases, I see that I at least don’t want to feel that way… Regardless, by approaching my fears, I am feeling stronger instead of weaker. I feel strong in the face of things that normally (and still do) completely crush me and turn me into a whimpering weakling. How is that possible? I no longer feel like “it” is some big, looming, all-powerful thing that was sent to harm me. All these things just are. I’m going slowly, at my own pace, and I’m processing and letting go of these fears. Some are going to be way harder to process than others, but I will come up with something that works for me. Just because it hasn’t happened yet doesn’t mean that it won’t. I’m confident that was time goes on I will only feel better and better about life and its possibilities.