Why Do We Have to Hit Rock Bottom to See The Light?

Why does it seem like everyone is parading around pretending that they are not broken inside? Why is that something to be ashamed of? Every single one of us has the same needs deep down, and the same general fears. For some reason, we feel like that has to be covered up and denied. We feel like it makes us bad. So we put on a façade, and meanwhile we break more and more on the inside until we finally snap and collapse. Only at that point do we “need help” and surrender, in shame. Why is that? If we’d just been admitting our issues along the way, we could have sought out the spiritual lessons to help heal those parts of us and prevented them from causing us to fully break. Why is it that we have to hit rock bottom before we are willing to reach out, change our perspective, and finally open up enough to entertain the idea that we are enough, the only love we need is our own, and that we can do anything we want?

We could have been learning these things along the way, couldn’t we? Are we literally biologically not capable of it? What about the whole “have the mind of a child” thing, and how we started off understanding but the world taught us wrong-mindedness?

You shouldn’t have to be an alcoholic to work the 12 steps. You shouldn’t have to be an addict to be rehabilitated, or go to prison to find God. And yet, that seems to be the order of things. Why are we all so terrified of opening up to this way of thinking? Why do we choose to shame people who “let” themselves crack, when we all think we are on the verge, ourselves? Somehow that moment of rock bottom when people have no choice but to reevaluate their entire lives is… terrifying, shameful, and then heavenly. And then we are so cynical that we don’t even believe that people have really turned their lives around. We are so terrified of falling that far, and we can’t even imagine having to crawl back from it. We are teetering so precariously on our own tightrope of sanity, and for some reason we have to believe that falling means we disappear into a hellish abyss instead of meaning we surrender to the supportive, soft, peaceful clouds below. And we see someone float up to us, and we roll our eyes at what is clearly smoke and mirrors, right? Wrong. All that wasted energy – all that misery that we force on ourselves. That we CHOOSE. How come?

Maybe we all just feel really weak. We all depend on so many things these days, and we don’t think we could survive without all the luxuries of modern society. I guess that’s where my love of survival shows and books comes in. I felt weak and incompetent, too, which is why I try to study up on things that help mitigate that feeling. I think we are all way more resourceful than we give ourselves credit for. Maybe we just need to realize that, even in this physical and material world, we could survive. Make no mistake, it would be hard – near impossible. But not impossible.

Or maybe that’s not it at all. But what, then? Why do we hang on so tightly to this old, fearful way of thinking? Why are we so dismissive of all the foo foo stuff? Why do we feel such an obligation and responsibility to being miserable and hard on ourselves?

Maybe that’s the entire point of life. Maybe the point is to find this mentality. And then to… help others find it, too? Even though no path is the same… that’s the problem. No path is the same. I can’t sit here and explain to you how I got here, or where “here” even is. I just know it is wonderful and full of hope, REAL hope, not just blind foolish hope, and I want everyone to find their way here and beyond. But everyone’s path is going to be different. Some will find it through various religions. Some will find it in various activities. I guess the only way to truly help others find their way is to just do it yourself, and show that you are happy and fulfilled. If nothing else, they’ll get curious from their jealousy, right? Maybe they’ll dismiss you as foolish for a while, but if they stick around long enough, they’ll see that somehow, despite not aligning with what they think makes life great, you appear to be happy and fulfilled. And somewhere deep inside, something might stir.

It’s funny, really. We say we want to be happy, but then we choose not to be. So illogical, and yet we are so engulfed in it we can’t see outside of it enough to know how ridiculous it is.

I’m so grateful that I’ve found the blogs, books, videos and people in my life that have cultivated this spirituality in me. Once you start on that path, everything just starts clicking, and seriously, people and books just start falling at your feet. You just have to start asking the right questions. I remember before I started really making changes, I was going to bookstores looking for something. I didn’t know what exactly I was looking for. I wouldn’t have even known to use the word “inspiring”. I just wanted to find something to help me and inspire me, but not some foo foo self-help, “10 Steps to Being Happy” crap. I didn’t know what I wanted, exactly. I read a few books that didn’t quite hit the mark. But then, once my mind opened (from my perspective making me so stressed out that I had physical ailments and admitting that if how I thought was true, I was literally going to be miserable my entire life, and how I felt about certain people just didn't add up, and there MUST be another way to look at things, because my way just didn't make sense to me anymore, or if it did, I didn't want it to), all the books in the world started flooding to me that were exactly what I was looking for.

Just remember that even if people are being mean and nasty, they are merely blind. Blind to the truth. They are zombies held captive by fear. Deep down they are still like you and me. (Okay, breaking the zombie metaphor, I know) So don’t be harsh with them, and don’t let them suck you down into their negativity – they NEED for you to be light, and the more they fight it and mock it, the more they need you to stand firm in your light.